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The unlimited supply of Mexican Beers @ work intoxicated the minds of the employees. Employees were secretly indulging in alcoholic drinks without the Manager's consent. Risky, ain't it? LoL!

Excitement @ work, the freedom of constant flirtin', earnin' extra cheese, & gettin' tipsy. As noticed by Jack & Derrick, "You're in the spotlight, always surrounded by the male species." I'm conceited! LoL!

The tragic outcome of my previous relationship made me think wisely or should I mention, wildly? The failures in my relationships got me cravin' for somethin' different, somethin' exhilaratin'. And not forgettin' the influence of Giggles on me. She is one BAD CHICA!

-Oh-So-Precious-Lincoln-

-Exhausted after work-

The connection between me & "the Big Guy" keeps gettin' deeper & deeper, day by day. Is it me or am I hallucinatin'? From a sister- brotherhood to booty- calls? He is my entertainment @ work. And lately we've been more personal w/ each other. Knowin' myself particularly well, I might take it the wrong way & act serious upon it. The one- half of me says to go for it, taste a lil' sample of him. (Sikes!)

Am I selfish? Am I a whore? Here I am most likely breakin' my own heart. He has a woman in his life. And I'm tryin' 2 lure him 2wards my direction. Well... I never clued or forced him in2 anythin'. He chose 2 be attracted 2 me. He chose 2 be by my side. I also know he has some sort of feelings 2wards me but he doesn't want 2 be committed 2 me, or get too serious w/ me, jus' a booty- call, sorta thing.

NO, DON'T TRIP! We haven't done anythin'. He volunteered 2 give me a ride home. And geez... I absolutely adore his LINCOLN!!! The speaker set blastin' while the installed DVD player in the front seat were played by the "LowRidin'" & music videos. I can't wait till his Lincoln gets transformed in2 a LowRider & I'll be in the passenger seat. LoL!

-Pic of a Lincoln LowRider-

Toasted Bagel with Philadelphia Cream Cheese. And fresh brewed home- made coffee. A simple & savory breakfast. It's so good to have Mom back home again. She took a three- day vacation to Seattle, Washington. She needed time- away from her annoyin' daughters! LoL! Bruce got me a colorful tote bag & Mom bought me a tee of Seattle. And last but not least, a surprise till my b'day.

Speakin' of my b'day, I have yet to plan. I have made a checklist but who knows what is best? Gotta be perfection, y'kno'... Clubbin' w/ friends??? I don't kno'... Teddy Bear's Big 21st b'day is comin' up too & we might host a double- b'day- bash. One thing is fo' sho', I'mma be buzzed, real drunk!!! I need a night to release this inner stress.


19th b'day:
* Rent-a-car- July 23 or 24 (For a week)
* Get My Paycheck- July 26 (After School)
* Family Dinner @ Olive Garden- July 26
* Party @ Century Club- July 28
* Teddy Bear's b'day Bash- July 29th
* Lunch with Henry- August 2nd

"Da Bad Boy" returned to work yesterday. I was lookin' 4ward to tis day. I clocked in an hour earlier than usual. He was stationed @ the Grill & I approached him, keepin' my composure calm. I noticed he was unusually quiet & when he saw me comin', his eyes lightened up, his face expression went from mono to spirited.

We exchanged hugs (Damn... His body is firm. He had a clean cut, bald to be exact! And he was freshly shaved. With his Cook's hat, WOW!!!) I haven't seen him in like two months.

We planned on going clubbin' for my 19th b'day. Imagine me freak dancin' w/ him & buzzed! Can't wait!

He also showed me several sexual graphics on his cell. And the one that attracted me the most was da Angel & da Devil makin' love. I thought it reminds me of the both of us, I am da Angel on top of him da Devil. LoL!

Another Clue:
Cutie- Lazy Shaz: Hey, Sexy- Lazy! What does triste mean in Spanish?
Sexy- Lazy Jackie: Oh, it means Sad. Why you ask?
Cutie- Lazy Shaz: Hmmm... So that means that noche tristes is Sad Nights then?
Sexy- Lazy Jackie: Yes... Why? Did Malo tell you that?
Cutie- Lazy Shaz: Huh? What Malo?
Sexy- Lazy Jackie: Haha... You know what I am takin' 'bout. Malo, JAVIER.
*Total shockness*

TRUST NOBODY!

Date: July 9, '06
Venue: Rieber Hall
Source: MySpace Msg
Characters: "Ms-New-Booty," "Ms-Gossip-Biatch," "Ms-All-That."

Introduction:
According to mi mama, "TRUST NOBODY!!!" esp. tu amigas.

Scene 1:
As usual, she updated me 'bout the latest gossip & what- not. She goes, "Would you believe me if I said "Ms-All-That" is still a V?" My eyes focusin' on the screen, I'm going like, "wtf?" I mean literally! To read an online msg, you would expect somethin' juicy & entertainin' but this is completely bogus 2 me. Seriously, I have better things 2 keep up with. First & foremost, I don't give a shyt if "Ms-All-That" is still a V or not. To say the very least, I don't talk 'bout anyone's private shyt, much less her vagina? C'mon now, "Ms-Gossip-Biatch" needs 2 get a life.

Scene 2:
She went braggin' 'bout her 21st b'day plans 2 Vegas. On top of that, she sent me an early invition 2 me & shyt. 1) Vegas is not new 2 me. I've been there. And I prefer the plane as opposed 2 the road! 2) With her family, I don't mind but with the Dad taggin' along, HELL FUCKEN NO!!! Hey now!!! Mind you guys! Her b'day is not until fucken December. I don't get her fucken motive but she damn right knows, MY B'DAY IS AROUND THE CORNER!!! So, what is that biatch goin' 2 do? Spite my 19th b'day? Fucken poison my cake w/ some rat drug & says I am responsible 4 food poisonin'? NO WAY!!! Or desperately tryin' 2 hurt me internally? That works cause obviously I am quite affected by it.

Conclusion:
I replied in a straight-to-your-face manner & if that biatch can't take it, so be it. Like Derrick says, I am a straight- up person. I would rather lose a dump than keep a dump!

P.S. This is not the first time & never will be! She was the wall that separated me & JayJay! She was the reason me & my Mom fought cause of the stupid Prom & the money! And now this! Next time, what? Completely ruin the brother-&-sister bond that me & Malo has?

My entire body is sore to the core. For the past two days, I've been a workaholic to make up for lost time. 8 hours a day. Back to Rieber again, I would assume complete joy to be surrounded by my lovely coworkers. I am only 60 percent delightful cause apparently, my beloved one is on vacation!!! That means no sight of him for the next 6 days.

Day by day, I find myself falling for him. I try to ignore the fact that he has an 11-year-old son & we are 11 years difference in age. I recently found out that Xie Yu's Mom (May Allah bless her soul) has passed away. Once again, I am the last one to know. Rieber Hall made a contribution box & my beloved was the first person to send his condolences. His heart is certainly pure, not only towards me but to everyone else.

Only time will tell

The extreme & I do mean the over-the-top good news is that bastard coward chickened out on me!!! Hell fucken yea... Damn right he did! Saw his name on the work schedule for the month of July straight & didn't show up at Rieber on the first day. How thrilling is that! It sure is my early b'day gift! However as y'all know, Shaz is never satisfied. I seek for revenge! I seek for violence to those who has hurt me! It is a need for me to be his GREATEST NIGHTMARE!!! Call me a beast, call me whatever. But I definitely need to get my hands on him!!! I want to torture him by crook. I want to strangle him till he cries & begs for my forgiveness!!! That fucken nigga!!!

P.S. In Speech Class, we presented our Visual Aid Challenge & our Professor thought our presentation was the best on our purpose: "Threats to your Computer." Thumbs Up!

It was quite entertainin' at the Indonesian Consulate on Saturday except for the usual stuck- up teens. I have grown to view them as, "The Invisibles" now. LoL! The best part was, now Derina's parents have officially met my Mom. So it's all good, right? And they seem to get along pretty well. My Mom was kinda creeped out by her Dad though. LoL!

(PICS TO BE POSTED UP SHORTLY! AND THE DEBUT OF MY SISTER'S INDO DANCE! DON'T MISS IT!)

2morrow I have to report back to work again. Totally unprepared! For the past two weeks, I feel like I was in a faraway land doing nothing but moping around! What a bummer... =(

Speaking of faraway land, I have the sudden urge to book a flight to somewhere completely foreign & passive to me. Take a nice break away from the U.S. & travel ALONE!!! Yea... You heard me right! The current book that I am reading (With or Without You written by my favorite author, Carole Matthews) inspired me to step out of the borders, be obsessively independent, and then who knows? Maybe, just maybe, I just might meet the Man of My Dreams, My So- Called Mr. Right. (Yea, sure... Keep dreamin', Ms. Leo!)

Alright... This is truly an absurb & dull post... LoL!

- Shaz

This is without a doubt, the Worst & Most Disappointing World Cup ever!!!
It's not because my opinions are biased and not objective, but because I truly and deeply feel suspicious about the international event. Why is that so?

Raised in a country with great anticipation towards the sport and calling it "football" instead of soccer, I have seen both the ups & downs of the game. With the professional leagues and players from all around the globe, I know if the game is worth watching & worth supporting. And I respect them with all my heart.

World Cup '06, an ugly & rough turnout. The event was inspiring until the very start of the Quarter- Finals which completely changed my views. The game starts to get real ugly especially between the Portugal vs. Netherlands match. The referees are treating the opponent teams differently. The players attempting to brainwash the blind minds of the referees i.e. Michael Ballack talking head-to-head with the referee. What is the world turning to?

Where is the love? Where is the sense of unity? Where is the friendly match? Where is the exhange of jerseys? Where are the smiles & hugs? Where did it go? Does the slogan, "Say No to Racism" apply or mean anything?

I know I have no rights or evidence to prove my point but comparing to the last World Cup, all the Top 4 teams that advanced to the Semi- Finals were from different continents. What the hell happened after the next four years? All the teams that advanced to the Semi- Finals this year are European teams!!! Don't you think there's some dirty work involved behind the damn curtains?

The Third Place round of World Cup '02 was the most beautiful match of them all. Yes, Turkey vs. South Korea. After the game ended, both teams stood in a straight line with their arms around each other and literally bowed to the spectators. I broke into tears knowing that winning is not everything.

Teams like Argentina, Brazil, Ukraine, & England that clearly deserve to move forward into the competition were knocked down by contenders that are hungry for the gold prize. In my mind, the teams that went home this round are the true WINNERS cause greed & anger did not control them.

- Shaz